Yesterday me and my marching band went on our annual trip to Cedar Point. I was originally hanging out with my friends, then we saw my ex...
On our way from Michigan to Ohio, we stopped at McDonald's to get some food, I was on my *ahem* timeofthemonth, and I needed some painkillers. FAST. My ex needed to go to the gas station across the street to get something. So I said oh I will go with you. We had to run to and fro to make it back to the bus on time...
LATER my friends and I were catching the train so we could go ride the mantis, but they later decided they wanted to ride something else first, but Michael and his friends were going to just go to Mantis first, I really wanted to go with them, so my one friend just said if I wanted to go I could. So I did.
We got up to the mantis, and by the way, IT DOWN POURED and we were all soaked, I wore some shorts, a tank top, and I had a soaked hoodie with me. Anyway, we got up there and I started shivering. So my ex put his arm around me to help warm me up. I didn't even say anything, I was just really cold, he didn't have to, but he did. Then he was saying that I should really put on my hoodie even though it was soaked, because I would feel way better. ... I listened to him...
We went on a few rides, and we went on this one ride called the "Scrambler" (look it up if you're confused) and my ex was like, you wanna sit next to me? so of course I just said sure. so we were sitting there, and he sat on the outside, and me trying to keep it from being awkward, I tried to not run into him but I eventually gave up.. He told me when we were on it, "not to be like a jerk or anything but I have been having an awesome time today, without you being all rude and stuff"
*just to explain, we dated for a week before band camp, and we broke up, and I found out a few weeks later, it was because, I can be rude, and bossy, and he was looking for the type of girl who will let the boy be the hero.. I think I have figured out, that I really should just stop acting like such a guy. the problem is, I have been that way since I was little...*
What's funny is that I would try SO hard after he said that to keep up on not being, well a b!tch, and I don't know what I did, but I guess, I am no matter what. I would make one SMALL sarcastic comedic comment, and he would just be like (in a joking matter I think/hope) shut up, you b!tch (it was seriously in such a joking matter, just like the way he would say it). What I don't understand is... He was being a total JERK later on!! but on the bus he was all cool and fun again. my problem is that when I got home, all I could think about was him putting his arm around me and just being so nice, and fun. But when I woke up this morning, I started realizing the bad parts of him too...
also my friends on the bus after the gas station, asked me what I was waiting for, because it was SO obvious. They wanted to know if I was waiting for him to make the first move again (which I am) or what!
So now the question... Should I wake up from my little fantasy/hope that we will get back together? or Should I just work on my own traits, and try to work with his and follow my heart and hope that we could get back together?
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